Sometimes...

Sometimes good and bad things happen. Sometimes we don't know why. Sometimes God has a sense of humor. Sometimes we take a glimpse of our lives and wonder what lies ahead. Sometimes we have it all together and sometimes we don't. This blog is dedicated to every moment we have--because it reminds us we're alive.

• Sometimes I have a hankering to go to the beach and the best I can do is Utah Lake. At least I could put my feet in some water and not be in an office. Just a little taste of what it will feel like in two and a half weeks when I go on vacation to the Oregon coast.

• Sometimes everyone you know tries to help you feel better and you just end up pushing them away. Thanks to my friends and family who are trying. Pretty much thanks to anyone and everyone who is still talking to me. 
• Sometimes I think life will get better when (fill in the blank). But when it comes down to it, I'll always want something else to help me be happy. It's all part of the journey.
• Sometimes at work things don't go right. And then a group of three brothers comes in and makes it better because they're hilarious. Thanks to these guys for making me laugh. And for putting things in perspective. Just another growing experience...

• Sometimes I wonder why I'm not happy and I realize it's because I don't want to be happy yet. How irrational that someone wouldn't want to be happy. But it's true. How odd.
• Sometimes I feel like a fish drying out in this Utah desert.
• Sometimes I think of good analogies like the following: Working "behind the scenes" at BYU is a little like working "behind the scenes" at Disney. I'm honored to be a part of it, but also a little disenchanted. It takes away a little bit of the "magic." Just ask Megan....
• Speaking of Megan. Sometimes I am a mean boss and ask my employees to do gross jobs like clean the bumpers. Even when it ruins their pants. 

• Sometimes I make great Sunday dinners for my roommates and it surprises me that I can actually cook.

• Sometimes I realize how blatantly honest I am on my blog. I'm basically this honest with everyone all the time. It could get me in trouble, but it's also liberating.
• Sometimes this book makes me so so happy. 

• Sometimes I show up to work and I'm wearing the same pants as my coworker. Guess we know what's in style!

• Sometimes on my afternoon off from work I go to the Llama Fest with my brownie friend and her sisters. It was awesome to get away for a little bit and see life from a different perspective. Don't worry. I definitely bought a Llama shirt!

• Sometimes I take a break from work and see the 60th Anniversary showing of Singin' in the Rain in theaters. Definitely a good decision. 

• Always am I grateful to Heavenly Father that He allows me to learn lessons--be it the first time or after I've fallen flat on my face. Here's to learning a few more lessons in this life. And, almost more importantly, here's to vacation!

Looking forward to the future with Tony Bennett.

Hello to the world!

Lately I feel like I've posted my fair share of less than happy blogs. Well, right this very second in time I love life...and I think it only fair to share these feelings to balance the feelings as of late. Also, I really like bullet points (call it my red personality, controlling nature, perfectionism...take your pick) so I'm going to use them again:

• I remember a couple of years ago when I had just gotten dropped off by my family to enter my sophomore year of college, I was sitting alone in my kitchen. No other roommates had moved in yet, and I felt the most alone I've felt (or at least top 5 for sure). When I was in the "sulking" stage of feeling alone (yes, there are stages), I truly and honestly believed that the only person I had to lean on was Tony Bennett. Random? Yes. But he was about the only person in my itunes at the time. I just listened to his music over and over and over until I convinced myself that everything was going to turn out and that I wouldn't feel that empty and deserted for eternity. Eventually roommates moved in, I started work and school, I volunteered at an elementary school, I got friends and life was happy again.    A few years have now passed, and I found myself at a similar low point. I got home tonight and my roommate was listening to a song that Tony Bennett sings. It reminded me how everything is going to be alright. As Tony Bennett says, "Smile though your heart is aching. Smile even though it's breaking." Such a wise man.
• People always say how happiness is a choice. And happy people live longer. And it just takes a good attitude. Blah blah blah. Guess what? They're right. Today is a day that I've decided to just get over myself and realized that life is not nearly as bad as I think it is. I've heard that I take life more seriously than pretty much everyone else in the whole world. But really...let's take a step back. I work at a bowling alley and a clothing store in Provo, Utah. There's got to be more to life. This whole working 60-70 hour workweeks is temporary. I do have friends. Someone wise told me that I had to live my own life. It would be easy to live or want to live someone else's life. I've got to have my own struggles from which to learn.
• I'm surrounded by people who care about me, even if/when I push them away. I'm blessed to be able to earn money to pay for school which will in turn help me reach my goals and dreams of touching lives in the field of education. Wherever I end up in the world, eventually I will get used to it. And I don't have to decide in the next ten minutes what I'm going to do with my life. Lately I've learned that each and every day will throw you a curve ball--regardless of if you want it or not.
• I've come to realize that the Lord really is watching out for me. In the past week I've had more than a couple experiences a little too special to write about here..I'd just like to say that it's amazing what miracles can happen if you just look for them. I know that God is watching out for me. Thanks to everyone who has kept me in their prayers as of late. I can feel them. 
• I can't really contribute this great feeling I'm experiencing to one thing in particular, but I will say how amazing the power exercise is. I was doing pretty well in the month of May, but then June turned out to be not the most opportune time for exercise. I've decided that with one month until I run with my uncle in Portland, I'd better start getting a little more serious. I cannot have him kicking my trash :). Today was really the first day that I've had a good run since about May...and I'd forgotten just what it does for my life. I feel completely rejuvenated and ready to face the world yet again. 
• So it's a bit ironic...most people talk about storms in their lives and learning to "dance in the rain." Well, I've felt like living in this desert dries my life out--physically, mentally, emotionally...all of it. Today was proof that God does send the rain when we need it most--I mean that literally as well as metaphorically.

If you look closely enough, you can just see the rainbow. 

• Basically, to quote another Tony Bennett song, "The best is yet to come." And I'm really starting to believe that. Definitely looking forward to it. 

(End note: I know that these songs I quoted are not Tony Bennett originals...but they'll do for now.)

"Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory."

This is going to be a conglomeration of things happening in general. I hope you can be amused, entertained or at least have a good moment to ponder life away from school, work, screaming kids, etc.

• The Manti Pageant was awesome. I love that town of 3,040 people. The Christensen family was nice enough to bring me along and let me stay with some of their family overnight! Although there are other cool pageants out there, I will forever and always have a special place in my heart for the Manti "Mormon Miracle" Pageant. Some things that I've pondered since the pageant:
• It's fascinating how much can change in a life from one year to the next...and how much it doesn't change at the same time.
• I love meeting and talking to strangers. Sure, "stranger danger" might be applicable to 5 year olds, but I'm fairly certain that nice families at a Mormon Pageant are pretty safe. 
• There's nothing like a fresh perspective. At all.
• I'd like to visit small towns more often. They have a charm that can't be found anywhere else. 
• Adventures on foot feel quite different than adventures on wheels.

Manti, Utah

7 rows back=great seats!

Jessica, me and Tiffany

• I found this new place called Nellie's Diner that is absolutely delicious. Best dessert in Provo hands down. Here is picture proof that: 
• A-I have friends to eat with.
• B-The dessert is delicious
• C-I do, in fact, take time off work to have fun

• Meanwhile, at work...I've decided that work is great. For so many reasons.
1. It gives me something to do.
2. It pays the bills.
3. It gives me stuff to worry about.
4. I can see my friends.
5. I can buy cute stuff for a good price.
6. I am learning a lot.
• Although it's really tough living 800 miles away from family, I know that they are still cheering for me. Even if it's just through social media, I know that they still love me and are worried. Only about 6 weeks and I'll see them once again.
• Spokane. Goodness I miss that city. I miss the lack of smoke and the abundant rain. The high for Spokane yesterday was Provo's low at night. Hmmm....
• Speaking of smoke. The whole state of Utah seems to be on fire. Not to mention Colorado, Montana, and all the other places as well. I hope the firefighters can get these fires under control. I snapped a few pictures amidst the falling ash on Sunday. 

There are mountains that direction--I promise!

• I've been contemplating life quite a bit lately. I've got two more semesters of classes, one or two semesters of teaching and then I'm going to get this piece of paper that proves I studied and paid a LOT of money to prove I can teach. I'm stoked. For a long time I thought I wanted to stay in Utah, but now I'm not so convinced. Lately, this city has been drawing my attention. Gorgeous, isn't it?

Medford, Oregon

• Sometimes you just need a Happy Birthday cupcake. Especially when it's not your birthday. 

• 4th of July...my plans? Sit inside and watch movies and pray that no fireworks light my house on fire. So here's a rant: I really, really, really do not understand why city officials are still allowing fireworks to be set off when there are so many wildfires burning already. I can only keep my fingers crossed that no major damage happens tomorrow night. But in a positive light: Happy Birthday America!
• I'm obsessed with the movie and I watch it pretty much every chance I get. I can relate to it on some levels and I love watching it. Reese Witherspoon looks really creepy in this picture..

• I have the most difficult time filling my few hours of free time each day. Any suggestions? 

Until next time.....and in case I don't see you--good afternoon, good evening and goodnight. 

That awkward moment..

That awkward moment when: 

• You're really hungry, but you don't have the desire to make or buy food.
• You walk around in a fog and you feel like the only solution is that you're in an alternate universe.
• You realize that everyone wants to give advice. 
• You realize all that advice is wrong.
• You should have gone with your gut to begin with.
• You remember you were supposed to be training for a half marathon, but you haven't run in about 2 weeks.
• You see someone you know, so you wave at them. Except they just turn around and walk away.
• You see someone you really need to talk to, but they just smile and scurry.
• You realize you don't have to do anything. Ever.
• You have great ideas, but they're scattered all over the place. Literally.
• All you want to do is sit curled up on your couch and have your mom cook for you, but then you remember you live 800 miles away from home, and mapquest estimates it will take 11 hours and 25 minutes to get there by car.
• You get out of your car and you see it spraying anti-freeze/coolant everywhere. And then 10 people start looking and whispering. And you say to yourself, "Smile and wave, boys. Smile and wave."

• You work 60 hours a week and then come home and do the dishes. Every day.
• What you thought was a weakness in others and a strength in you really turns out to be a strength for others and a weakness for you.
• You realize every song ever written is about love.
• You realize you're an island.
• You don't know what you're supposed to do at your job, and everyone keeps asking every 2 seconds for an answer.
• Taylor Swift reminds you that "Everybody's waiting. Everybody's watching. Everybody's waiting for you to breakdown. Everybody's watching to see the fallout." And yet, you continue to write a blog. 
• People tell you to "just be happy." And that it will never help to sit around for the rest of your life. And all you can do is restrain yourself from punching them in the face.
• You're ready for this.
• You feel like you're 13 even though you're 21. I should be able to "handle" life by this point. Right?
• All you want to do is go walk down this street:

• You're upset that you don't have cable TV for the single reason that you can't watch House Hunters or Golden Girls.

• You miss this. 47 more days.

• You remember you're supposed to be making huge decisions. But you can't even decide what shirt to wear for the day.
• You calculate your budget and wish you could return 79% of the stuff you've bought in the last month.
• You want to buy a half baked chocolate chip cookie sundae and the diner is closed after you get off work.
• You have so much more you could say, but you should probably be done blogging for the time being.

"Stop this train. I can't take the speed it's moving in."

This past week I had the pleasure of seeing three super amazing friends who I haven't seen in over two years. Incredible how time flies. Nothing seems to have changed--and yet everything has changed. I'm so grateful for my friends and what a large part they play in my life. Thank you to each and every one of you who has served a mission, will serve a mission, is serving a mission, or is thinking about serving a mission. I look up to and respect you more than you'll probably ever know.

1.      (Elder) Parker Geren

·         Background story: We grew up in diapers together--our parents are long time friends. Thank goodness for Parker and his amazing energy. Thank you for setting the example Pahka! It was really great that you could stop by my work and say hi!

2.      (Elder) Tyler Christensen

·         Background story: Freshman year at BYU. We lived in the same apartment complex, and apparently we both had enough snark that we could stand one another. Countless adventures and miles of road later, we became friends! Thank you for serving an honorable mission. It was wonderful to see you again.

3.      (Elder) Taylor Johnson

·         Background story: Freshman year at BYU...again the same apartment complex. Taylor reached out to me when I needed a friend most. Thank you for being one of the most respectful, dedicated and compassionate people I know. I enjoyed the surprise visit!

"They had waxed strong in the knowledge of the truth; for they were men of a sound understanding and they had searched the scriptures diligently, that they might know the word of God."
Alma 17: 2

The not so adventurous adventure...

Dear Readers,

I inform you most confidently that I'm alive. And in mostly one piece. Often I find myself being the stick in the mud and flaking out at every available opportunity. Therefore, I went out on a limb and made myself go on this grand adventure:

• Who: Ward Friends (8 of us)
• Where: Spanish Fork Hot Pots
• What: To have some sort of ridiculously adventurous adventure at the Spanish Fork Hot Pots
• When: Monday, May 28, 2012 10 pm-1 am
• Why: Who really knows....we're young and dumb

This is what the hot pots look like in the daylight (these are the real hot pots): 

This is what I remember about the path to the hot pots at night (imagine this as pitch black, and a river-ish stream instead of the ocean, but keep in mind the cliff-ish nature to the right of the path):

Galileo Galilei once said, "You cannot teach a man anything. You can only help him discover it within himself." I think this man has a fantastic point. Tough and challenging situations require intense self-discovery.

Although it was out of my comfort zone, I think this trip was worthwhile because of what I learned about myself while hiking narrow trails next to cliffs at midnight in foreign territory. 

After all was said and done, I think I would participate in similar activities again--just to discover what is yet unknown. On the other hand, I don't know at what point it would be too dangerous or too much. As someone wise said, "Being young is all about doing dumb things...that hopefully are not too dangerous." I think this photo evidence proves that I'm learning from my experiences...bit by bit.

Fin.

Found: Some free time...Also, just call me Piranha.

Bonjour! Hola...

For Cinco de Mayo, I decided to work about 10 hours. But luckily I have really great friends who make me homemade tacos for the holiday! Thanks to Sam for delicious Mexican food..

I promise not all my pictures have to do with food!

Who in the world would have thought that real food (i.e., chicken, potatoes, rice, bread, etc.) would be so very enjoyable? And affordable. Tonight I had chicken and pasta--is it sad that I was looking forward to it all day long?

Lately I've been obsessed with two songs. I'll share :) Ingrid Michaelson's "Far Away" and Coldplay and Rihanna's "Princess of China"

I've decided that instead of just waiting for good ideas to come, I should just write regularly. Because much has happened since I began this post. I've gained the new nickname of Piranha, I got more cute clothes for cheap (that's kind of a daily thing), I am officially friends with my brownie friend!

I'm obsessed with running and it turns out I'm training too hard. Surprise anyone? Probably not. The other day I stopped to take this picture because it was so beautiful outside. I love this street. I'm officially training for a half marathon. Fingers crossed it works out! I'm excited to have a goal and something to work towards. Again--surprise anyone?

I've compiled a list of reasons when you know you work too much:

1. You use the bathroom at work much more than your own bathroom.
2. You're on a first name basis with the girl who serves you brownies.
3. You forget that Trendy X Change is not your own personal closet.
4. You get upset when you don't get paid to do something.
5. You calculate the exact amount of hours of work necessary to afford gas and food and still have free time. 
6. It's the only nice thing people can think of to say about you: "You're real good at working..."

And the list goes on and on...

Every once in a while, just when you think life is going alright... BAM! Something comes along to remind you the whole purpose of why we're here--to learn, to grow, to become better. Although it's really painful and awkward to be reminded that we're not perfect, well, I guess in the words of someone wise, "Get over it." Lately it's come to my attention just how imperfect I am. So here's to a better half of 2012 with a new and improved Glenna.

I love when I make myself have fun, and yes--it can be a legitimate challenge. Mostly I like chilling with this girl...playing dumb games that make NO sense and including her in some fun college drama :) Love you Tiff.

Happy Memorial Day!! Thank you to all those have served, are serving, or will serve our country. We owe you our lives and our freedom. God Bless You.

As always, I miss my famille. But I know things are going to work out alright. You know why? Because "Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end." 

Me, Myself, and I

Dear anyone who finds this of worth,

Currently really enjoying my time with me, myself, and I. It's nice to be able to work 60 hours a week and then to run, or to shop, or to just sit down and think about life. Although it sounds lonely to most people I talk to (and I can understand where they're coming from), I see lonely as the following: [lohn-lee], adjective, the ability to accomplish anything and everything I desire when I desire it. Although I look forward to a future of a family and a "real" settled down life, I love having the uninterrupted, spontaneous freedom!

Today I got some really good parking spots at Costco and a few other places, and it made me miss my Turner grandparents. I hope the both of you are finding your own good parking spots! I'm thinking of hanging up a clothesline behind my apartment upon which to dry my clothes--just for you. I promise to make sure all those step-ants are out of the sheets first!

The past week of moving in and finding a place for everything is probably a familiar task to most of you. I should have it down to a science by now, but I'm still working on it! A few days after we moved in, we got a note on our door that said, in essence, "Please take everything you just unpacked out of the cupboards. We're coming by in a few days to paint with an extremely smelly latex paint. Sorry for the inconvenience...." Yep. So we unpacked everything (see pictures below). I woke up this morning and went to the kitchen for breakfast, and the scene reminded me of two things: 1. A World War, and 2. My Life. Trying to put things together and make sense of it all. I snapped a picture...I'm trying to do more of that these days.

Yesterday at job #2 (Trendy X Change) I helped a man who said he was from Medford, Oregon. This, of course, made me miss my Kunze grandparents. He said his last name was McClure--his dad might be your Bishop? Small world! I'm thinking of applying for teaching positions in Medford when I graduate...could be interesting!

I have officially gone off my rocker--I rode a motorcycle! No, not by myself. It was on my bucket list of things to NEVER do in my entire life. I feel empowered that I could override my own decision-making skills. It was exhilarating to zip around town and feel the wind rush by. Of course I was wearing a helmet--hope no one had a heart attack thinking about that.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my little sister!!!!! I can't believe she's 17 years old. To quote a wise man of old (Jacob 6:12), "O be wise; what can I say more?" I'm excited for you :) Just sad that I won't be there to embarrass you in front of everyone! Someday I hope I can be as cool as you. Although this picture is about 16 years old, I hope you can still party this hard, Megs.

Speaking of cake--I was blessed this year to have 3 birthday cakes. How I love Birthdays. Thanks to everyone :)

Last week I met a woman who stated, "Everyone can dance. One just needs to find the style that fits." At face value, I wanted to scoff and say, "Listen, lady. Have you met me? I don't have an ounce of rhythm in my body." But instead I took some wise advice (thank you Grandpa Walter) and pondered the statement without retort. She was so incredibly right! Not only did this statement apply to dancing, but a multiplicity of others: Work, school, playing music, making friends, packing to move, writing letters, making the bed...the list goes on and on. I'm hereby officially adopting this statement as a part of my life: I can do hard things (thanks Sister Dalton) as long as I find the style that works for me.

This whole past week I've found myself driving around and pretending that I was in Spokane. I spent about 18 years preparing to leave, and now that I'm semi-officially removed from Spokane, I miss it! It has such charm and character. And it will forever and always be considered "home". The list of things I miss could go on and on and on, but I promised this would be less dry than toast. So I'll just show a few pictures.

And the list goes on and on!

Well, this should probably come to a close at some point. For now, I suppose my motto is "keep on keepin' on." My goal this week is to find one method of service every day (yes, mom, I stole this idea from you).

With love,

Glenna/G-Twist/Nenny, etc.